Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
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