Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
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