things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
