Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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