More tranny stories later!
By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Randomize
