obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
In America we eat man semen.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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