Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Randomize
