some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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