i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize