were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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