he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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