what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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