i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Randomize
