I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Randomize
