she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
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