Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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