just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
