Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
