we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Randomize
