his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
