Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
