Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
