Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
im about as happy as oj after his trial
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
