we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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