Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
