So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
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