We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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