How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
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