so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Randomize
