So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Randomize
