I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
she peed on how many people?
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
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