So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Randomize
