so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
