The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize
