Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
