If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
