She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
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He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
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jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
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