i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
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