The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Randomize
