Who wears a wallet chain?!
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
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