my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
How does it feel to date your dad?
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Randomize
