So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
