I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
