At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
Randomize