so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
