I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
That's when you crack a 10am beer
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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