i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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