Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Randomize