Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
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