Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Randomize
