I hate your face
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
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