Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Randomize
